Linda, I didn’t know you celebrated ANY Thanksgiving in Canada! I also didn’t realize your work is mostly with Americans — now I really feel sorry for you!

I left off one part of our Thanksgiving — early Christmas shopping — another reason I dislike the holiday soooo much!

One of the best Thanksgivings I’ve had in a long time was two years ago when my husband and I skipped town and went to New Smyrna Beach. Stayed at an ocean-front hotel and ate amazing Italian food for our Thanksgiving dinner! Lovely holiday.

By the way, I detest our Thanksgiving foods:

  1. Turkey (I am a vegetarian)
  2. Dressing (bread wet from the turkey’s bodily fluids)
  3. Corn pudding (baby food)
  4. Turkey Gravy (See #1)
  5. Green Bean Casserole (Yuck!)
  6. Jello Salad — Usually Green or Red (See #1 — Jello is not vegetarian and See #5 — double yuck!)

The only exceptions are mashed potatoes without gravy, of course, and bread, IF there is any decent home-baked whole grain rolls or loaves, and some of the desserts — pumpkin pie is my favorite.

Sadly and ironically, when I was married before, my husband’s family came to our tiny house in the country for Thanksgiving dinner. Twenty-five or more people in a 1,080 sq ft house. I roasted two turkeys —the vegetarian roasted two turkeys! How wrong is that?? I truly think I was out of my mind all those years. I also made the disgusting bodily-fluid-wet-bread dressing and one or two desserts. Family members brought the other dishes. At the meal, the only items on my plate would be a mound of mashed potatoes with melted butter, perhaps a whole grain roll, and a piece of pumpkin pie! Carbohydrate hell.

Just as I spent hours and hours preparing for the dinner, I spent hours and hours cleaning up after the dinner. I’ll give my then-husband credit for pitching in for the cleanup although he conveniently disappeared for the preparation. Probably a good thing — I may have accidentally shoved him in the oven instead of one of the turkeys!

Like I said, I was out of my mind back then!

I wish you, in advance, a Happy Canadian Thanksgiving, whatever that entails for you. Enjoy as you wish. Preferably without Americans and American food — yuck!

I was always a writer but lived in a bookkeeper’s body before I found Medium and broke free — well, almost. Working to work less and write more.

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