Thank you, Kathy. We do seem to have a connection, don’t we?
I talk or video-chat with the kids two or three times a week and try to stay chipper and happy but usually end up in tears before the end of the call. I feel bad because that makes them sad but I can’t help it. I actually think the video-chats are more difficult and emotional for me.
I’ve wanted to get a package sent to them but haven’t done it. I work so much and with our new dogs and all the adjustments at home, I can barely keep up with all that has to be done. But, I’ve promised myself to get it done this week.
I know I made Ben sound heartless and he isn’t. He simply hates to see me sad and doesn’t want our few hours together to be spent watching me cry. I get that, but I also know I need to process my sadness and don’t know when else to do it. I don’t think my clients want to pay me for crying while I work!!
I function. I do what has to be done. I have some fun. But, there is always this underlying deep sadness that flavors everything. Trying to figure out how to get rid of it but haven’t. Maybe it is here to stay.
Thanks again and always for your support, Kathy!